Dad’s cancer – Before the hospice

In January my dad had a faint and was unconscious for nearly the whole day.

He had a pulse, but he could not be woken up.

My mum called the paramedic and they injected him something and after some time he started reacting.  He was not completely ok, but he understood everything and could blink with his eyes to show that.

Funnily enough during his unconsciousness none of us (my brothers, my mum and me) cried or was in any other way shocked or scared.

After that incident however, it was clear that he couldn’t stay at home alone.  My mum had to work all day, so she couldn’t look after him.  That’s why we first tried it with a center for elderly people, where they only stayed over the day.

My dad was the youngest there with only 53 years and he was bored.  So he started wandering off, smoked a lot and after a few weeks he was dismissed, because of his behaviour.

Then my aunt, his youngest sister, agreed to be his “babysitter”.  She soon had to discover that it wasn’t that easy and that she was wrong in thinking he maybe could be healed.

I loved my dad and I still do, but seeing him struggle with the most trivial things was like torture to me.

But seeing him so sad at dinner, looking at us, knowing the couldn’t stay home much longer, because he needed better treatment, was heartbreaking.

I’d like to thank all my new followers and I’m sorry for this rather depressing post.  I just don’t want to euphemise this terrible disease and I want people to now how horrible it can be in reality (Some people like to romanticise cancer and it sickens me).

Feel free to leave a comment or to ask questions.  I hope you have a nice day!

-Mareike

🙂

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